(Day 10) Thankful for Strength

philippians4_13ljmaI’ve shared that I have been battling fatigue and I finally have a doctor’s appointment scheduled. My day 10 was a full day of activities including work and helping others. I was exhausted! Thankfully I found that the scripture that says “I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me” (Philippians 4:13) is true. I am relying on that strength to continue to get me through each day this week. I am also relying on the Lord to give wisdom to the doctor in what to do for me whether it is adjusting my medication or running blood tests. I know that I am in the Lord’s care. I am thankful that He is in charge of my life and I submit to all that He has in store for me.

What are you thankful for today?

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(Day 9) Give Thanks To The Lord

photo-1414589491349-2acf6131176ePsalm 105:1 NLT says, “Give thanks to the Lord and proclaim his greatness. Let the whole world know what he has done.”  I could fill pages upon pages of testimonies to what the Lord has done in my life. I am convinced that I am alive today only because of His mercy and grace. I’ve done nothing to deserve it and I will forever give Him thanks.

Today has been another day of fatigue for me but I am working on getting back on track with my goals. It is going to take hard work and consistency for me to be successful. I already see one success that I haven’t really paid attention to and that is the fact that I am not giving up. I am not beating myself up for not following through on my goals which is huge for me. I used to be awful to myself. It really doesn’t help nor is it any kind of motivator. Proverbs 24:16a NLT says, “The godly may trip seven times, but they will get up again.”  I may trip or I may fall but I will get back up and keep walking in this journey. I just give thanks to the Lord for teaching me every step of the way.

What are you giving thanks to the Lord for today?

(Day 7) Still Thankful for Friends

1john4_11There was a time when I didn’t have many friends. I remember praying for friends, praying for women that would speak into my life and women that I could hang out with, go to dinner or a movie or just sit and chat for hours. I am so thankful that the Lord answered my prayer above and beyond what I could ever imagine. This has been a week that I have truly been thankful for praying friends. I know they are praying for me, I feel it.

Today has been another day where I just haven’t had any energy so I slept all day. I got up early, did some studying and then laid on my couch to listen to a book and the next thing I knew it was 6 hours later. So much for my day! That’s kind of how my weekends have been lately. Lots of sleeping but this week has been the worst. I think I may have slept more hours than I’ve been awake. Well at least it feels that way.

So a friend invited me to dinner (where we ate breakfast haha) and while we were waiting on the waitress to take our order I was yawning. My friend asked me how I could possibly be yawning when I slept all day. I told her that I could go back to sleep right then and be happy. Then we got into a conversation about my health, my medications, my eating habits, etc. She suggested that maybe I should go see my doctor because maybe this fatigue I’ve been having is due to my medication or has a medical reason. Duh! I had not even considered that! My blood sugar has been lower than it has been in 10 years. I am a diabetic who was quite non-compliant for a long time, I hate to admit that but its the truth. Monday I will be making an appointment with my doctor and see what she says. Sometimes you just need a friend to point out the things that you don’t even think about.

Thank you Jesus for my friends!

(Day 6) Thankful for Friends

proverbs27_9ljmToday was a really tough day. I’ve come face to face with the reality that I am overwhelmed and my spinning plates are falling all over the place. I couldn’t even get this blog post done without hitting some key to cause my whole draft of 500+ words to disappear. POOF GONE!

Breathe…

This week has been a mess. I go back to Monday when I got some news that caused me a moment of panic but I already had the answer because the Lord gave it to me.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord.” Jeremiah 17:7 ESV

I wish I could say that I have rested in the truth of those words. The reality is I didn’t. What I thought was peace was really denial. My mouth said the right things but my actions spoke louder. I ran back to the same habits I’ve been running to for years and years. Food. I ran to food yet I didn’t even realize it until today because I was in denial. Yes I knew that the sickness I had was mostly brought on by my own doing but while I was down, while I was sick, while I was in a down time mode even if by force, my focus was not on the Lord. My gaze went from being on Jesus to being on myself. Oh I glanced at Jesus now and then but the steady gaze that I’ve been holding for a while was interrupted. If we were sitting at a table across from one another you would have just seen me slump in my chair and smile. Of course the words that I was writing before these words were lost. They were truth but only surface truth. I believe the Lord wanted me to be open and vulnerable. He wanted me to get to the root of the issue rather than just talk about the outward things that had a small part to play in the way my week has gone.

This realization causes me to appreciate my friends that were there for me today even more. I had two Skype calls with a friend who prayed for me. She also rounded up others to pray for me. I started crashing around noon from not having enough sleep and waking up extra early. I took a 10 minute power nap on my lunch break but it didn’t help much. I was tired, empty and the fire inside me that had been burning with such intensity had dwindled to a slight flicker. I had an event that I was supposed to attend this evening that I had to back out of and I felt really guilty about it. Then my wise friend who knows me oh so well told me that I needed to rest, heal and prioritize. Her words were like a text from Jesus as she pointed out some things that I knew but I was in denial about. My response was that she was right and I am going to refocus, reprioritize and rest. So that is exactly what I am going to do. I am so thankful for friends. Friends who are not afraid to speak the truth in love. Friends that pray and pray some more.

Proverbs 27:9 NLT, “The heartfelt counsel of a friend is as sweet as perfume and incense.”

Until tomorrow…

(Days 3-5) Thankful for A New Day

I missed posting days 3 and 4 because I got really sick. I had a terrible stomach bug that incapacitated me for more than 35 hours. So I basically slept 2 days away because I could do nothing more. Nonetheless I am thankful for that sleep as I feel much better this morning. I happened to open up a productivity app on my phone that I was using a year ago and I read one of my goals which was to write down foods that hurt me. I am thankful that I found that because I am going to implement that again to my daily routine. I cannot afford to have stomach issues take me out for two days again.

As much as I wanted to leave my post at the last paragraph and move on to some good news, I just cannot move on. You see I’m sure that my stomach virus was the direct result of my own doing. I know that I cannot eat certain things and yet my flesh tends to win over when I’m not really thinking through what I’m doing. So this two day experience has exposed the fact that I’m eating mindlessly and it’s hurting me. This picture kind of sums up what I see in myself right about now.

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While I felt that the Lord convicted me that my stomach virus was the direct result of my own doing, my nurse friend advised me that I could not have caused my own fever and hot and cold flashes. Okay, point taken but I still know that I have been engaging in mindless eating which is gluttony.

Proverbs 23:20-21 ESV says, “Be not among drunkards or among gluttonous eaters of meat, for the drunkard and the glutton will come to poverty, and slumber will clothe them with rags.” I don’t drink but to be associated with a drunkard as someone who is engaging in gluttony causes me to sit up and take notice. It’s not something new to me. I have battled with being a food addict for a very long time. I was able to kick every other bad habit but this food thing is literally the hardest. I mean think about it, no one needs to smoke, drink or do drugs but we have to eat for survival. So to me being a food addict is way harder than kicking any other habit.

The good new is that I don’t have to remain in this condition and I have already taken this to the Lord in prayer and repentance. I am thankful for His forgiveness and grace. I don’t have to be bound by the addiction to food because John 8:36 says, “Therefore if the Son makes you free, you shall be free indeed.” I will keep pressing into the Lord to help me walk away from this mindless eating. I will make strides in working my goals and lean into the Lord Jesus as my foundation as I build my temple.

Now for the good news of the day. I am down 2.8 lbs since last week and I am truly thankful for this. Maybe it is from being sick two days and maybe not, I don’t know for sure but my goal is not to find those 2.8 lbs again. I will press on in the journey, no turning back!

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Thanks for walking with me on this journey!

(Day 2) Being Thankful

Today started like a typical Monday. I read my Bible, prayed and then had a conversation with my accountability partner. Shortly thereafter I got some news that caused an initial panic in me but quickly turned around as I had already been prepared with my morning Bible reading.

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord.” Jeremiah 17:7 ESV

stress-391657_1280I was talking to my daughter when I got the news and relayed it to my daughter who said, “What are you going to do?”. My response was quick as I shouted, “Thank You Jesus”, then proceeded to read the above verse to her. I share this with you today because for me this is something to be thankful for as I am not always so calm when it comes to stressful situations. My daughter noticed the difference in me right away. I noticed it right away as well. The Lord has been teaching me so much this year so if this was a test, I think I may have passed it. Although the true test will be in maintaining my peace and trust in the Lord.

Another thing to be thankful for is that I managed to follow the majority of my goals today. I ate 3 servings of vegetables and 3 servings of fruit and drank my 4 liters of water. While I did not do any exercise today, I am perfectly content with that as I will use today as a rest day. I also ate something sweet today so I will be sure not to eat any desserts or sweets again until next week.

Overall today was a great day to be thankful in all things, good things, unexpected things, yes…all things. I am looking forward to seeing what tomorrow will bring. I am trusting my unknown future to my known God and I know He is in charge of it all!

“Blessed is the man who trusts in the Lord, whose trust is the Lord.” Jeremiah 17:7 ESV